The last eight years have taken a toll on me. There have been moments of deep sorrow - losing my dad, losing my brother, losing a grandmother, struggling to have a baby. But there has also been great joy. From getting married, to having our beautiful children. Somewhere in there my body changed to one I no longer recognize.
I lost weight after having our daughter in 2010. It was slow to come off, but before getting pregnant again with our son in 2012, I had lost 60 something pounds. Unfortunately I gained it all back. And it's come back, and stayed, in places I am not used to being my "problem" area - namely my stomach.
In the 16 months since his birth, I have struggled to lose weight. Even remaining faithful to our Paleo/Primal diet it was just not coming off. While nursing the first 12 months, I found that any restriction in my caloric intake resulted in a big supply dip while pumping. A dip I couldn't afford. So I set the diet aside and focused on exercise instead. After he turned 1, I tried a Paleo Challenge. I found myself utterly unsatisfied. And though I was strict, the weight just wasn't coming off like it had before.
I decided to try something different, and added whole grains back in. I also joined a fitness boot camp 3 mornings a week. Slowly, but surely, the weight has started to come off again.
I decided to try something different and harder to really spark a change in what I see in the mirror. So on June 16, 2014 I started the Jillian Michaels Body Revolution Program. I'm currently on Day 2 of the 7 day kick starter, and then will start the 90 day program next Monday. This is my journey.
Tuesday, June 17, 2014
Monday, February 25, 2013
Meal Plan Monday 2013 Week 1
As Spring approaches and the weather is nicer, this week's dinners are all about using up the freezer stash of comfort hearty food I've built up over the last few months. Mainly because I don't really feel like chili when it's 65 or warmer out. Simply needed to re-heat rather than cook is an added bonus.
DINNERS
Crock Pot Sausage and Peppers from My Paleo Crock Pot.
Chicken and Veggie Soup
Shredded Chicken Tacos made from left over Rock Salt Chicken ( the best chicken I have ever made)
Hot Dog Chili (like a chili dog without the bun) from Health-Bent
Spaghetti Sauce and Squash
LUNCH
Left overs
Lunch meat; olives; cucumbers; fruit; almond milk yogurt
Almond Butter & Jelly served on Paleo Pancakes instead of bread (see recipe below)
BREAKFAST
Sweet Potato Hash - I shred a whole sweet potato, with skin on, in my Ninja blender (we sadly have no food processor), heat some coconut oil and add the potato and either cinnamon or Italian seasoning depending on my mood. Cook through (about 10 minutes). Sometimes I'll cook bacon or sausage first and then add in the potato for a one-pot dish.
Eggs
Cinnamon Bun Muffins from Elena's Pantry
Almond Banana Pancakes from Mark's Daily Apple
DINNERS
Crock Pot Sausage and Peppers from My Paleo Crock Pot.
Chicken and Veggie Soup
Shredded Chicken Tacos made from left over Rock Salt Chicken ( the best chicken I have ever made)
Hot Dog Chili (like a chili dog without the bun) from Health-Bent
Spaghetti Sauce and Squash
- Pro Tip (did you know you can freeze spaghetti squash? I cook it, put it in muffin tins, freeze and then save it in a zip lock for quick meals)
LUNCH
Left overs
Lunch meat; olives; cucumbers; fruit; almond milk yogurt
Almond Butter & Jelly served on Paleo Pancakes instead of bread (see recipe below)
BREAKFAST
Sweet Potato Hash - I shred a whole sweet potato, with skin on, in my Ninja blender (we sadly have no food processor), heat some coconut oil and add the potato and either cinnamon or Italian seasoning depending on my mood. Cook through (about 10 minutes). Sometimes I'll cook bacon or sausage first and then add in the potato for a one-pot dish.
Eggs
Cinnamon Bun Muffins from Elena's Pantry
Almond Banana Pancakes from Mark's Daily Apple
Saturday, February 23, 2013
Knowing When To Quit
I started the 21 DSD off last week strong. Even with a husband who was working an insane amount of overtime, leaving me to solo-parent 20 hours out of the day, I ate very cleanly. I did not crave sugar and didn't even have the urge to hit the Starbuck's drive-thru despite very little sleep.
Yet there was a big downside to the detox - my milk supply. I am breast feeding our little guy. It's something that is very important to me. I will not compromise nursing him in favor of any diet. By Thursday I knew something wasn't right. He wanted to nurse all-day-long. It wasn't a growth spurt style nursing marathon, it was a "hey I'm not getting enough here" protest.
I looked at my water log, and knew I was having plenty. Then I looked at my food log, and therein lies the problem. Breastfeeding alone burns 500 extra calories a day. Add in the minimal exercise I get from walking to the park or around the zoo, and the extra calories burned from carrying a newborn in one-arm while chasing a toddler, and occasionally also carrying a 30lb toddler on the opposite hip, and I need A LOT of calories in a day. The way my life is right now, I need food that I can eat AND prepare with one hand. Anything requiring two hands, or holding the potential of dropping and burning the newborn in my arms is out. No dairy and no gluten makes this hard enough. Add in no-fruit and it becomes almost impossible to get enough calories.
I tried making up for my deficit by eating my weight in almonds. But that is neither fun, nor probably very healthy in its own right. The 21 DSD advises nursing moms add in some sweet potato with every meal, which I was doing but still ending up without enough calories. I'm sure some of the hardcore Paleo enthusiasts would advise I just up my intake of grass-fed, nitrate free, free-range bacon and hard-boiled eggs, but frankly I don't think that's very healthy.
So I've decided to forgo the 21 DSD for now. I think it's a great program, and hope to complete it at some point once my milk supply is more establish, and Little Dude doesn't rely on me for all of his nutrition. We will still be Paleo since I can't have dairy. But there will be no official program we're on. For now I'm just going to focus on eating things that fit the Paleo guidelines and are easy to eat with one arm. Hopefully this will solve the caloric-intake issue. Especially as I begin to run again in T-3 days!
Yet there was a big downside to the detox - my milk supply. I am breast feeding our little guy. It's something that is very important to me. I will not compromise nursing him in favor of any diet. By Thursday I knew something wasn't right. He wanted to nurse all-day-long. It wasn't a growth spurt style nursing marathon, it was a "hey I'm not getting enough here" protest.
I looked at my water log, and knew I was having plenty. Then I looked at my food log, and therein lies the problem. Breastfeeding alone burns 500 extra calories a day. Add in the minimal exercise I get from walking to the park or around the zoo, and the extra calories burned from carrying a newborn in one-arm while chasing a toddler, and occasionally also carrying a 30lb toddler on the opposite hip, and I need A LOT of calories in a day. The way my life is right now, I need food that I can eat AND prepare with one hand. Anything requiring two hands, or holding the potential of dropping and burning the newborn in my arms is out. No dairy and no gluten makes this hard enough. Add in no-fruit and it becomes almost impossible to get enough calories.
I tried making up for my deficit by eating my weight in almonds. But that is neither fun, nor probably very healthy in its own right. The 21 DSD advises nursing moms add in some sweet potato with every meal, which I was doing but still ending up without enough calories. I'm sure some of the hardcore Paleo enthusiasts would advise I just up my intake of grass-fed, nitrate free, free-range bacon and hard-boiled eggs, but frankly I don't think that's very healthy.
So I've decided to forgo the 21 DSD for now. I think it's a great program, and hope to complete it at some point once my milk supply is more establish, and Little Dude doesn't rely on me for all of his nutrition. We will still be Paleo since I can't have dairy. But there will be no official program we're on. For now I'm just going to focus on eating things that fit the Paleo guidelines and are easy to eat with one arm. Hopefully this will solve the caloric-intake issue. Especially as I begin to run again in T-3 days!
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
Work Out Wednesday
I've gotten a lot of questions lately about how I ran so long in pregnancy. And a friend suggested I blog about fitness as well as eating. Since I'm not yet able to work out, rather than post my work out plan for this week, I'll focus on what I did the last 10 or so months.
In my late teens and early 20s I ran for the fun of it, and even ran with my college's club cross country team. Then I graduated law school, got married and got a real job. Somewhere in there I lost the art of finding time to take care of myself. I started to get serious about running again after Hailey was born. But it was not until my brother was killed that I found myself needing to run. I found great solace in putting one foot in front of the other and just letting my mind go. When we were younger we used to run together - and by run together I mean I about killed myself to keep up with a guy who never trained yet easily ran a sub-7 minute mile on unfairly tall frame. My runs became a way for me to "talk" to him again, as well as a way to work through the sadness and anger - to let all the things I wanted to say to his killer but couldn't go,
By April I found myself actually looking forward to running. My 10 year college reunion was in May and I really looked forward to running the trails there again. When I was finally able to lace up my shoes and go for that run, I found it unexpectedly hard and had to catch my breath a few times. The day we returned home I was ecstatic to learn I was pregnant.
It was then I started researching running while pregnant. I read the Runner's World Guide ** and asked my doctor and decided to keep going. My first doctor was old-school and said I could run as long as my heart rate never got over 140, which was almost painfully slow. But I kept plodding along. I made mini goals for myself by signing up for 5ks and ended up doing a 5k at 8weeks, 20 weeks, 24 weeks and 32 weeks. I listened to my body and slowed down when needed and took breaks as necessary.
At 23 weeks I changed doctors, for the better. And on her advice stopped tracking my heartbeat and instead listened to my body and made sure not to get too worked up. This helped my runs to be more enjoyable. As I got bigger I found I needed support for my belly. I tried a few belts and ended up loving the Belly Bra ** which I felt gave more support overall. And there was no need to try to adjust it when my belly became huge and I stopped being able to see below my belly button.
After my last 5K I decided to just go until I no longer felt comfortable. At 35 weeks I was put on temporary restrictions due to contractions, so I stopped running for a bit. I started up again at 36.5 weeks, but then fell (unrelated I was walking to get lunch) the next day and twisted my ankle, bringing an end to my pregnant running career.
My best advice is that like running at any other time, it's 90% mental. Sure you feel like crud especially those early weeks, but you'll feel so much better once you get out there. Staying active keeps both you and baby healthy. Of course you should always get the approval of your doctor, but I am happy to answer any questions you have about my personal experience.
** full disclosure I'll get a very small stipend if you buy either item linked.
In my late teens and early 20s I ran for the fun of it, and even ran with my college's club cross country team. Then I graduated law school, got married and got a real job. Somewhere in there I lost the art of finding time to take care of myself. I started to get serious about running again after Hailey was born. But it was not until my brother was killed that I found myself needing to run. I found great solace in putting one foot in front of the other and just letting my mind go. When we were younger we used to run together - and by run together I mean I about killed myself to keep up with a guy who never trained yet easily ran a sub-7 minute mile on unfairly tall frame. My runs became a way for me to "talk" to him again, as well as a way to work through the sadness and anger - to let all the things I wanted to say to his killer but couldn't go,
By April I found myself actually looking forward to running. My 10 year college reunion was in May and I really looked forward to running the trails there again. When I was finally able to lace up my shoes and go for that run, I found it unexpectedly hard and had to catch my breath a few times. The day we returned home I was ecstatic to learn I was pregnant.
It was then I started researching running while pregnant. I read the Runner's World Guide ** and asked my doctor and decided to keep going. My first doctor was old-school and said I could run as long as my heart rate never got over 140, which was almost painfully slow. But I kept plodding along. I made mini goals for myself by signing up for 5ks and ended up doing a 5k at 8weeks, 20 weeks, 24 weeks and 32 weeks. I listened to my body and slowed down when needed and took breaks as necessary.
At 23 weeks I changed doctors, for the better. And on her advice stopped tracking my heartbeat and instead listened to my body and made sure not to get too worked up. This helped my runs to be more enjoyable. As I got bigger I found I needed support for my belly. I tried a few belts and ended up loving the Belly Bra ** which I felt gave more support overall. And there was no need to try to adjust it when my belly became huge and I stopped being able to see below my belly button.
After my last 5K I decided to just go until I no longer felt comfortable. At 35 weeks I was put on temporary restrictions due to contractions, so I stopped running for a bit. I started up again at 36.5 weeks, but then fell (unrelated I was walking to get lunch) the next day and twisted my ankle, bringing an end to my pregnant running career.
My best advice is that like running at any other time, it's 90% mental. Sure you feel like crud especially those early weeks, but you'll feel so much better once you get out there. Staying active keeps both you and baby healthy. Of course you should always get the approval of your doctor, but I am happy to answer any questions you have about my personal experience.
** full disclosure I'll get a very small stipend if you buy either item linked.
Sunday, February 17, 2013
21 DSD - restart
So, I'm not perfect. I mean I know no one is perfect - this week I have been far from perfect when it comes to our detox. We were supposed to start on Monday. But then I didn't get to the store on the weekend, and told myself I'd go first thing Monday morning.
Except when you have a newborn and a 2 year old nothing goes according to plan. NOTHING.
By Sunday night at 9 pm I knew I was not going to get any sleep. Our newest addition had become very congested thanks to a cold his sister had picked up and lovingly shared with the family. My mind kept going back to a blog I'd read when Hailey was a baby about another baby who died at a week old from choking on phlegm after catching a sibling's cold. No sleep it was. By Monday morning he sounded much better, but I felt horrible. There was no way I was getting to the store.
By Monday night it was clear I'd caught the cold. I wanted nothing but orange juice by the gallon. Our meals were clean and DSD approved, but my snacks were horrible. The whole week was definitely not 21 DSD approved.
Friday Graham had his 2 week check-up and my suspicions about him being dairy sensitive were confirmed, so I have been good about no dairy. But sugar and gluten have still made their way into my diet this weekend.
So we are restarting...or rather starting for real this time. I know I definitely need to work on my snacks. Last week I'd planned smoothies as snacks. But between nursing, diaper changing, and spending quality time with Hailey, cutting up veggies and such to throw in the blender? Not happening. Without those smoothies I get horribly caloric deficient thanks to nursing, so I end up starving and just grabbing whatever is near. This week I have plans to have pre-cut veggies and nuts at the ready to grab and go .
Except when you have a newborn and a 2 year old nothing goes according to plan. NOTHING.
By Sunday night at 9 pm I knew I was not going to get any sleep. Our newest addition had become very congested thanks to a cold his sister had picked up and lovingly shared with the family. My mind kept going back to a blog I'd read when Hailey was a baby about another baby who died at a week old from choking on phlegm after catching a sibling's cold. No sleep it was. By Monday morning he sounded much better, but I felt horrible. There was no way I was getting to the store.
By Monday night it was clear I'd caught the cold. I wanted nothing but orange juice by the gallon. Our meals were clean and DSD approved, but my snacks were horrible. The whole week was definitely not 21 DSD approved.
Friday Graham had his 2 week check-up and my suspicions about him being dairy sensitive were confirmed, so I have been good about no dairy. But sugar and gluten have still made their way into my diet this weekend.
So we are restarting...or rather starting for real this time. I know I definitely need to work on my snacks. Last week I'd planned smoothies as snacks. But between nursing, diaper changing, and spending quality time with Hailey, cutting up veggies and such to throw in the blender? Not happening. Without those smoothies I get horribly caloric deficient thanks to nursing, so I end up starving and just grabbing whatever is near. This week I have plans to have pre-cut veggies and nuts at the ready to grab and go .
Sunday, February 10, 2013
It's Been a While
Hello World, it's been a while.
To say I had a difficult 2012 would be a great understatement. Dealing with the aftermath of my brother's death took up a great deal of time. Add in caring for a growing toddler and getting pregnant in May, not to mention continuing to work ... well there just wasn't a lot of time left for blogging.
One of my goals for 2013 (as a New Years Baby, I don't make resolutions), is to get this blog going again. Since our household is starting a 21 Day Sugar Detox tomorrow (February 11), it seemed like a great time to start the blog up again.
The detox is basically 3 weeks of very strict primal, eliminating sweeteners including all fruit. The exception is 1 green apple or green tipped banana a day. The strict detox also eliminates sweet potatoes/yams and winter squashes. However, it makes modifications for breastfeeding. Using that modification I will be having 1/2 cup of sweet potato with every meal.
I realize February 11 is an odd day to start a detox. Most people, including the official 21 Day Sugar Detox groups on Facebook, start on the first of the month. Because our son was born January 30, 2013, February 1 was just not a good day for us to start a detox. I used the first full week home with him to satisfy some major cravings I'd built up over the last 7 months (being a gestational diabetic meant I was not having cheat meals 20% of the time like I normally would). While I would not have been satisfied without having my sushi, milkshakes and birthday cake - and really feel like I earned all those things - I also don't feel that great. I'm ready to get back on track, and think this sugar detox is the perfect way to do it.
I credit staying Primal throughout my pregnancy for having my gestational diabetes in much better control than I did with our daughter. While I gained more weight (25lbs v. 2lbs with Hailey), it was well within my goal. I think the comparison photos below show the effect of my Primal diet on my pregnancy the best. Both were taken at 36 weeks, I'm pregnant with Graham in the grey and with Hailey in the white.
To say I had a difficult 2012 would be a great understatement. Dealing with the aftermath of my brother's death took up a great deal of time. Add in caring for a growing toddler and getting pregnant in May, not to mention continuing to work ... well there just wasn't a lot of time left for blogging.
One of my goals for 2013 (as a New Years Baby, I don't make resolutions), is to get this blog going again. Since our household is starting a 21 Day Sugar Detox tomorrow (February 11), it seemed like a great time to start the blog up again.
The detox is basically 3 weeks of very strict primal, eliminating sweeteners including all fruit. The exception is 1 green apple or green tipped banana a day. The strict detox also eliminates sweet potatoes/yams and winter squashes. However, it makes modifications for breastfeeding. Using that modification I will be having 1/2 cup of sweet potato with every meal.
I realize February 11 is an odd day to start a detox. Most people, including the official 21 Day Sugar Detox groups on Facebook, start on the first of the month. Because our son was born January 30, 2013, February 1 was just not a good day for us to start a detox. I used the first full week home with him to satisfy some major cravings I'd built up over the last 7 months (being a gestational diabetic meant I was not having cheat meals 20% of the time like I normally would). While I would not have been satisfied without having my sushi, milkshakes and birthday cake - and really feel like I earned all those things - I also don't feel that great. I'm ready to get back on track, and think this sugar detox is the perfect way to do it.
I credit staying Primal throughout my pregnancy for having my gestational diabetes in much better control than I did with our daughter. While I gained more weight (25lbs v. 2lbs with Hailey), it was well within my goal. I think the comparison photos below show the effect of my Primal diet on my pregnancy the best. Both were taken at 36 weeks, I'm pregnant with Graham in the grey and with Hailey in the white.
Monday, April 23, 2012
The Dress
I've had a dress-suit hanging in my closet unworn for a little over three years. It was my favorite for a long time. It had gotten a little snug, but still fit fine, or so I thought. One day at my former job a 'lead' (think manager) took me into her office and told me I was too fat to wear it and needed to go shopping. Other women got taken in to be told they were inappropriately dressed. Without talking about how incredibly inappropriate this woman was, I will say it did a number on my self-esteem.
I hung that dress in my closet and thought "some day I'll be thin enough again." Three years, a complicated pregnancy, a baby, a year of breast-feeding (No I was not one of those people for home nursing sheds the pounds), and the discovery of Paleo and I am finally confident to wear the dress again.
I have not weighed myself since the start of our Whole30, but I know I'm losing weight. My clothes are the proof. The fact that I'm rocking "the dress" to work today and totally confident in it, just seals the deal.
I hung that dress in my closet and thought "some day I'll be thin enough again." Three years, a complicated pregnancy, a baby, a year of breast-feeding (No I was not one of those people for home nursing sheds the pounds), and the discovery of Paleo and I am finally confident to wear the dress again.
I have not weighed myself since the start of our Whole30, but I know I'm losing weight. My clothes are the proof. The fact that I'm rocking "the dress" to work today and totally confident in it, just seals the deal.
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